So moving is 50 Shades of Suck… but today I found my high school competition swim speedo in a random drawer, put it on over my clothes along with goggles and a swim cap and a ‘swimming’ medal around my neck then went running around my house screaming ‘TEAM USA! TEAM USA!! TEAM USA!’ at my flabbergasted and mortified family.
‘Dad,’ my brother said, ‘I think it’s finally time we had her committed.’
Bonus: I’m wearing jeans so the button fly under my swimsuit definitely looked like a penis bulge.
This has been a patriot post.
My thoughts go out to all those involved in the shooting at the Eaton Centre in Toronto tonight. What a terrible thing to happen in such a great city.
http://www.montrealgazette.com/touch/news/story.html?id=6720888
So utterly sad.
Final portrait of the condemned stemware. Goodbye tacky flamingo/snowmen glasses. Enjoy the recycling bin.
I MISSED THIS???
Packing boxes for the move and just realized… Sweet Jesus I dressed myself exactly like my mother today. Omg. It’s happened. The transformation is go for launch. Omg. Deep breaths. Omg. I’m wearing KHAKIS. Mayday. Mayday. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I have a sequin problem. This doesn’t even include my other closet.
Please send backup (dancers).
| C: | awww, we're that lunch table in Mean Girls! | GIRLS WHO EAT THEIR FEELINGS |
| A: | oh we ARE | ohhhhhh | that's so sad for us | why am I laughing so hard? |
tlbb:
It’s unacceptable, it’s ignorant, and it makes you look like an idiot.
And I will call you out on it.
Apparently, my blog is a series of rants today.
As someone who has a nephew with developmental disabilities and is keenly aware of the difficulties that has presented, I am always offended by the use of this word. It’s particularly awful up here in Boston, as “retarded” is more common than “stupid” in conversation. And, unfortunately, the well informed and intelligent folks are often those who I hear use it the most.
Fighting the fight against misuse of ‘retarded’ in the midwest is just as monstrous.
But worth it.
Nothing cures the ‘I miss my best friend’ sads like a mandatory-no-pants Skype date… that fails when your laptop overheats and is immediately replaced with a long FaceTime chat.
This is how the Mitchamots do holiday weekends.
Last March, we invited you to help test Cards Against Humanity in our Research Lab. We’ve simulated over 100,000 hands and crunched that data for your amusement.
You can check out some of the trends at CardsAgainstHumanity.com/science.
| Elise: | hahaha yess | i feel like a loose low up-do would be gorgeous | not upstagey but elegant and subtle | either that or helga braids just because that would be mother fucking hilarious | never tell lz is said that | alright pats | i gotta head to lunch | and by lunch i mean the asian nail place in the breezeway of le mall | my feet are straight-up reptar | and i'd like to not have talons for p's big day. you know, to make up for my drunken behavior | so i'm not that wasted girl with the talons | be back later! 143!!! |
| Elise: | well, i'm super pumped for this weekend! |
| me: | me too! | although I still need to 'pick out' an updo |
| Elise: | all the way up? |
| me: | yeah | preferably flattering? | i don't have high hopes | i just wanna call roger down at the bee hive and have him back comb my hair. girl please. |
Why yes, I WILL be watching the Lifetime Original Movie “The Boy She Met Online”.
DAMNIT! i knew i should have watched that instead of Mrs Winterbourne. Damn you Ricki Lake. DAMN YOU!
had the same reaction to this, only my Saturday afternoon was spent half-asleep, watching Selling Spelling Manor and maybe drooling just a bit on a pillow.
